Wiggliest Person ever! ...I've seen contortion...but this is amazing. (video link)

"I Did Not Know That"...step-by-step instructions on how to do unusual things. Inspired by the cat restraint post, I found out how to restrain a camel. Then I wondered what other instructions there are out there for odd things you had no idea there'd be instructions for.

Monkeys for sale... and the woefully stupid cheap bastards who want them. more inside

Senator Simian Says Make Your Own Laws! Ok...it's really Senator Simitian, but I like the idea. What's your law?

Care Bear Stare! We Monkeys could invent better catch phrases with our tails behind our backs! I know, of course, that you can't 'make' a catch phrase, but silliness must prevail in the face of logic. Propose three, and, if desired, how and when one might say them. more inside

Ante up, punk. I need some negotiating skills pronto. This recommended reading list has a selection of general interest tomes and if any monkeys want to weigh in on which books they also recommend I'd be internally grateful. I'm going up against a master in the next two weeks, for a whole lotta moola and a huge time commitment from me, and I'm stoked to stock up at Chapters. more inside

Turducken; The Other White, Then Dark, Then White Meat. more inside

Exit Mundi! Fifty ways to leave your planet. more inside

Desi Crews VS Minuteman Civil Defence Corps... Indo-Canadian gangster boyz go up against Vietnam vet militia members. Jesus H. Christ at a barn dance...this should be interesting.

2257: Using Kiddie Porn to Screw Us All ...Remember people, if you're not with us, you're for kiddie porn! How 2257 works. 2257 Part two. more inside

Curious George Flings Some Poo... Ok...I was cleaning the catbox today; scooping out the clumps of pee and the other solid bits...and I got me to thinking. Post Big One, toilets may not flush, and water be in too short supply to flush them with a bucket of water. more inside

Temporary homes for dogs and cats displaced by Katrina; they say they'll transport them to you, ANYWHERE! I've heard it reported that the ASPCA has a million dollars allocated for this creature rescue mission, and I bet people are probably volunteering to transport the critters far and wide should you be able to take them in. more inside

I Am Curious; Bubble. I've turned into a bubble tea zombie. I just love this stuff, and have 3 bubble tea joints within 3 blocks of my house. Anyone else a slave to Tea 'n' Lumpz?

Curious George: Hosting comparison I need some tech advice. I can usually work this stuff out, but in this case there are just to many variables, and I need youse monkeys bad! I've been working like a beast on all my projects of late, and my hosting service has ticked me off. more inside

Curious Empire-building George I'm thinking of setting something up whereby women interested in escorting and who want to know more about it can come to a seminar lead by moi...I figure I have enough material for 2 hours with room for lots of Q&A about T&A. Do you think it'd fly? Are women curious enough? How much should I charge? What you think, sexy curious monkeys? I'm jusy a-tossin' those irons in the fire...

Furious George I am being libelled on an escort review board. Is there still nothing that can be done about this legally? Information is being presented as factual which is clearly not. It's hard to really get an overview Google-wise. The operator of the board and myself are both in Canada. This is stressing me so badly I'm sick to my stomach.

Riding on my bicycle...I'm riding on my bike...THEN I'M KICKING YOUR ASS! "cyclotouriste" starts out a little sensitive, then gets crazier than yo mama on the pipe.

Straight From WTFistan I give thee that known as TRINP! Crossword Puzzle of Personal Given Names! Why our calender blows! Meet the number-crazed Miss Hecksenbasen! more inside

The Very Strange Tale of Candy Jones; Supermodel and CIA Hypnocourier "The government was pursuing exactly that line of research: creating an artificially-split personality out of an imaginary childhood playmate." more inside

Twelve-year-old Baby Confuses the Hell Out of Everyone ... (Click through UK Telegraph link)...and gets the conspiracy folk all a-twitter to boot. more inside