Late to the show (as usual)
Lessee, I graduated with a second masters a month ago. I also organize an annual school supplies drive for under-privileged children in Ghana (and personally deliver the supplies).
I really dont think this is it
You know petebest cannot quit
With all of his versin'
It's his outlet for cursin'
Yeah yeah... i know this rhyme's a piece of shit!
This is one of mine (guess when it was written!!)
I once had a boyfriend named Joe
Who is now my bitterest foe
The reason you see
Is as clear as can be
He dumped me for that ghastly old 'ho!
and 2 more stolen ones...
2 moments in Capt. Hook's past
The memories leave him aghast
A visit quite vile
From a Nile crocodile
And the time he was wiping his ass!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
There once was a girl from South Philly
Who quit Greenpeace coz she thought it was silly
I said "don't worry, Gayle
If you still wanna pet a whale,
Just undo my zipper and free willy!"
Another oldie but goodie:
1) There were two girls from Birmingham
I know a wild story concerning 'em
They lifted the frock
And diddled the cock
Of the bishop engaged in confirming 'em.
2) Now the bishop was nobody's fool
He'd been to a fine public school
He lowered his britches
And skewered those bitches
With his 12 inch episcopal tool.
3) But that didn't startle these 2
"Why", they laughed as the bishop withdrew!
"The vicar is quicker
And thicker and slicker
And longer and stronger than you!"
Ok ok...no more...at least not for the next few minutes!
All stolen over the years and memorized:
The god Thor told the blonde he was with
Who he was, hence his great monolith;
She exclaimed: "You are Thor?"
When they got off the floor
"I'm tho thor i dont think i can pith!"
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
From the depths of the crypts of St. Giles
Came a scream that echoed for miles!
Said the Vicar: "Good gracious!
Has Father Ignatius
Forgotten the Bishop has piles?!!!"
xxxxxxxxxx
Of all creatures that walk, swim or fly
I'll take cats, though i can't tell you why.
I'll not alter my course
For a dog or a horse
Yet for a little pussy i'd die!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
She frowned and called him Mr.
Because in sport he Kr.
And so in spite
That very night
This Mr. Kr. Sr.
Oh my God!! I came out of hiding to comment in this thread! Oh Bashi Bashi Bashi!?! Who am i going to make fun of now? .
posted by ramix 17 years ago
In "Self-postFilter:"
Late to the show (as usual) Lessee, I graduated with a second masters a month ago. I also organize an annual school supplies drive for under-privileged children in Ghana (and personally deliver the supplies).
posted by ramix 18 years ago
In "Hurricane Rita approaches."
Since some are forecasting that it will hit Houston, what's going to happen to the NOLA evacuees in the Houston Astrodome?
posted by ramix 18 years ago
In "The Debate on the Smacking Ban"
I say whup their butts...(at least the little fuckers that deserve it!) (and yeah i was whupped - and i turned out ok...)
posted by ramix 18 years ago
In "Can you dig a hole to China?"
On the international date line somewhere in the ocean...which makes sense since Ghana is on the greenwich meridian.
posted by ramix 18 years ago
In "Batter 'em"
Ah...Nostril's back! Now i can die happy!
posted by ramix 18 years ago
In "Widdle baby panda needs a widdle baby panda name..."
I am so dying of laughter at StoryBored's comment.
posted by ramix 18 years ago
In "Google has launched their IM client, Google Talk. "
I want to play too...my address is ewurama at gmail dot com
posted by ramix 18 years ago
In "In the Name of Jesus"
JC - so its wasn't the cheesemakers? Could you please then smite all them high and mighty cheesemakers in Tillamook Oregon then? Thanks much.
posted by ramix 18 years ago
In "Live Music ONLY!"
For some reason after I read about this I got the Abba song "Thank you for the music" stuck in my head.
posted by ramix 18 years ago
In "Curious George: Why do generic Cheerios taste so bad?"
Capn Renault, Pubix was Vitalstatistix's mistress. I should know, i was there!
posted by ramix 18 years ago
In "Curious George-I have a lifesize cardboard cutout of myself"
Lawyer huh?...that explains it!!!
posted by ramix 18 years ago
Capt Renault...aren't u a cop?
posted by ramix 18 years ago
In "How to fuck a donkey."
Quid...but i thought I was your girlfriend?
posted by ramix 18 years ago
In "Limerick"
I really dont think this is it You know petebest cannot quit With all of his versin' It's his outlet for cursin' Yeah yeah... i know this rhyme's a piece of shit!
posted by ramix 18 years ago
Tenacious' milky man-juice, Is not to be mistaken with Grey Goose While the vodka is malty His emission is salty And tastes like the jism of moose.
posted by ramix 18 years ago
This is one of mine (guess when it was written!!) I once had a boyfriend named Joe Who is now my bitterest foe The reason you see Is as clear as can be He dumped me for that ghastly old 'ho! and 2 more stolen ones... 2 moments in Capt. Hook's past The memories leave him aghast A visit quite vile From a Nile crocodile And the time he was wiping his ass! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx There once was a girl from South Philly Who quit Greenpeace coz she thought it was silly I said "don't worry, Gayle If you still wanna pet a whale, Just undo my zipper and free willy!"
posted by ramix 18 years ago
Another oldie but goodie: 1) There were two girls from Birmingham I know a wild story concerning 'em They lifted the frock And diddled the cock Of the bishop engaged in confirming 'em. 2) Now the bishop was nobody's fool He'd been to a fine public school He lowered his britches And skewered those bitches With his 12 inch episcopal tool. 3) But that didn't startle these 2 "Why", they laughed as the bishop withdrew! "The vicar is quicker And thicker and slicker And longer and stronger than you!" Ok ok...no more...at least not for the next few minutes!
posted by ramix 18 years ago
All stolen over the years and memorized: The god Thor told the blonde he was with Who he was, hence his great monolith; She exclaimed: "You are Thor?" When they got off the floor "I'm tho thor i dont think i can pith!" xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx From the depths of the crypts of St. Giles Came a scream that echoed for miles! Said the Vicar: "Good gracious! Has Father Ignatius Forgotten the Bishop has piles?!!!" xxxxxxxxxx Of all creatures that walk, swim or fly I'll take cats, though i can't tell you why. I'll not alter my course For a dog or a horse Yet for a little pussy i'd die! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx She frowned and called him Mr. Because in sport he Kr. And so in spite That very night This Mr. Kr. Sr.
posted by ramix 18 years ago
In "Curious George:"
Quidnunc is pregnant.
posted by ramix 18 years ago
(limited to the most recent 20 comments)