Oh FFS, I don't mean to. I just speak from experience, and it was the only experience I ever had. If I had jumped out of planes I'd be posting in jumping-out-of-planes threads. 'Sides, I've posted lots of times in non-social threads. So kindly stuff it.
Most responded that she was priceless. The others did have a dollar amount, and that I find amusing. "Well, Debbie, I'd say about a buck ninety-nine."
(I'm too young, or something. "Girlfriends" still makes my brain twitch a little. Middle-American small-town men in their 40s don't call all their buddies "my boyfriends.")
They'd have to sculpt them super-strong, though. 'Cause slip once when you're sliding a table across the room or something, and CRACK! and the painful to even witness, blargh.
Someone on SA, testosterone wading pool of the internet, essentially admitted to ever playing Star Ocean 2, or Kingdom Hearts? Hahaha sweet.
Anyway, many of these made me laugh. I'll skip the Mefi-like omgbestofthewebomg stuff. I laughed. That is all.
And those do look like boobs, rocket88...? Most women aren't actually gigando-inflato-mondo-huge like they're "supposed" to be. They're mostly flat, and they do lie along the ribcage instead of floating globulously in midair. You're quite the lucky man if you think they all look like porn stars. :p
(Mannequins, people, is it that hard? All it takes is a mannequin. I know this is some sort of artistic thing, but really.)
true that. I don't usually buy people clothes to begin with, not even relatives and such. It's too "this is how I want you to look / this is who I want you to be." Bleh.
The SO never got me anything, but I'd take books long before froufrou that's meant to benefit him in the first place. /sidetrack
Holy crap, I can think of few situations fraught with more risk than buying lingerie when you don't remember her size. Just shoot yourself in the head, it's less painful in the long run. I don't mean to be stereotypical, but... if a SO was wrong in either direction I'd be crushed. "Here's what I wish you were" vs. "You're a disgusting cow, honey, here's a tent". Or upstairs, "that's all you are, right?" vs. "this looked like it'd fit the hot salesgirl, omg she was stacked." Yay! So glad to be celibate.
That said, the wall's... a little scary. Is that really hot, to you? S'kinda disembodied and weird sounding to me. Amusing, but not hot.
Augh, so much Law of GVW going on. This is why I hate being a pedestrian; I know y'all have no qualms about running me over, because LOL you're (slightly) bigger than me so I totally deserved it LOL better get out of your way LOL.
/sidewalkrage
Fun article. It's the Isle of Misfit Toys!
It is still the definition, but it's hard to stay stick thin and keep the relevant curvy bits without surgical help, because you can't control where you deposit fat. How much you have, yes; where it sits, no. That's genetic as far as I know. So when you burn it, it comes from wherever it "wants to," which may include areas you don't want to lose.
Guys demand tiny limbs and waists, huge chests and perfect asses and then whine that they hate surgery, too. I guess nobody told them that women don't have magical abilities to direct where their bodies store this stuff, or they don't care. Sooooo we get little tiny stick-girls instead, because they can't help it. Some are genetically blessed to only have that 0.00001% of body fat sit ONLY where it's needed and nowhere else, and they have it good. Everyone else makes do.
(And I think the stick thing is aesthetically boring - they look like prepubescent boys to me, blah, I don't want to look like that! - but I understand that it's that or surgery for many.)
Hey, I never said that the media made you that way; I said you just were that way. That said, if you start saying "we evolved to chase 16-year-old girls with huge breasts because blah blah offspring, therefore I have to cheat on you with as many hot chicks as I can, see, it's all evolutionarily correct and you're WRONG AND BLOCKING THE TRUE FLOW OF NATURE by being upset about it" while in a supposedly caring relationship [true story], I'll still think you're a twerp. Sorry.
As civilized creatures we mitigate our basic urges with other needs and goals, like emotional connection and the many kinds of compatibility beyond "is it hot and will it bear my young." Or at least that's the idea.
oh, and at a shelf and a half of the stuff, the aforementioned was probably worth eh, two hundred bucks, I guess? Not at resale, so don't bother breaking into my apartment; I mean originally.
I don't care about my neighbors, who are all older and richer than me; as for my peers, not really, no. I'm backward, and they probably know that already. (Though, y'know, among my peers keeping up usually entails buying gaming consoles instead of cars.)
Actually, knowing that I can never be cool, I've gotten kind of touchy about it. I feel kind of sick inside when I buy/rent books/movies/music because someone with similar taste to mine liked them and they sound like something I'd also like. I feel like I'm poaching on someone else's territory. I have this concept that people should discover new diversions out of thin air, but I don't understand how this process works, so I'm left feeling like a worthless follower.
Ssssso, yeah, in that sense I keep up with the Joneses - I don't do it in order to impress other people, just to find things I like. And I hate it.
My most egregious example is my comic collection (stfu, I have one) - I know at least one other person who liked each title before I did. Not one was bought out of thin air; the one time I did that, I didn't care for it much. Though I've also bought things by word of mouth and not liked them very much, so it does cut both ways. Still. Baaa. Baaaaaaaaaaa.
These aren't Catholics; these are probably hard-line Protestants.
I remember this site; it's appallingly adorable and hilarious in its batshit insanity. Ultimately it represents a Dark Side version of something I believe very strongly in - parents taking responsibility for what their children view, instead of relying on legislation to parent for them - and for that it is sickening, but as a simple read for entertainment, it's hysterical in both senses of the word. I'm a bit divided. Still.
The Three-Letter Word might also be "God," taking the Lord's name in vain. No clue about the Worst Word Ever.
Didn't tell him to fuck off and die because I knew I couldn't get any better. And it was true, anyway. What am I supposed to say, "no, you're wrong, I am a hot-as-hell Amazon that every woman-coveting person across the earth lusts after, let me get my leotard"? The thing about the measurement stereotype is that it's not true. Women generally don't care, although a few do, and most of those are probably shallow jerks. Men? Well, y'know. I don't blame them and all, but they do care, and it is very important, even to the brightest and most emotionally centered of them.
We eventually split because our goals for LTRs were too different - he wanted to be taken care of his whole life by some magical, smokingly hot, perfectly nonemotional and always horny girlfriend who would instantly make all his problems go away, and I didn't want to be that person, let alone struggle to live up to such a ridiculous standard. I'd rather be a cat lady. Which I am. Except for the cat part. He went off, developed schizophrenia and now lives with his parents. THE END.
but I also cannot fathom why
You don't know any small-breasted women then (and millions envy you). I was harangued to no end because I didn't have the perfect "spherical" (his word) comic-book-heroine DDs that were on ex's List of What I Want in a Girlfriend. I was a D at the time (fucking weight loss, taking away the only good thing I ever had! *wail*), but it wasn't good enough. Nothing I did could ever make up for it.
That hurts, and being told you're not sexy - and, in our culture, therefore not valued - hurts, and if a person in that situation doesn't or can't say "fuck that, I am what I am," then... they sometimes do desperate things. That's one reason why.
amen to the free PC cycles bit. Really. And damn, the money too.
They might make it covert in order to keep it from drawing cheaters' attention, not honest players'. To a cheater this would be a big "Hi, here's what you need to crack and here's how it works!" sign. Clearly this didn't work, but I'm trying to think of *a* reason.
Well said, musingmelpomene. I got those stupid lines from my ex, "oh all girls care about blah blah blah," when really, I didn't. It was just his rampaging insecurity, made out to be my fault. And no amount of avowals on my part would convince him that it was a bad stereotype and not universal truth.
Fine, if you're going to be insecure, be that way. It's a little annoying, but not a big deal. But don't pin your paranoia on me and act like it's "how things really are." Because you made it up; it's all your gig. Making it out to be someone else's fault, and not about your own insecurity at all, sends a minor character flaw into the Really Fucking Annoying stratosphere.
/rant
Oh FFS, I don't mean to. I just speak from experience, and it was the only experience I ever had. If I had jumped out of planes I'd be posting in jumping-out-of-planes threads. 'Sides, I've posted lots of times in non-social threads. So kindly stuff it.
posted by Wurwilf 18 years ago
In "Des Res, complete with bride."
Most responded that she was priceless. The others did have a dollar amount, and that I find amusing. "Well, Debbie, I'd say about a buck ninety-nine." (I'm too young, or something. "Girlfriends" still makes my brain twitch a little. Middle-American small-town men in their 40s don't call all their buddies "my boyfriends.")
posted by Wurwilf 18 years ago
In "Wall of Boobies! (SFW)"
They'd have to sculpt them super-strong, though. 'Cause slip once when you're sliding a table across the room or something, and CRACK! and the painful to even witness, blargh.
posted by Wurwilf 18 years ago
In "Honest Videogame Titles"
Someone on SA, testosterone wading pool of the internet, essentially admitted to ever playing Star Ocean 2, or Kingdom Hearts? Hahaha sweet. Anyway, many of these made me laugh. I'll skip the Mefi-like omgbestofthewebomg stuff. I laughed. That is all.
posted by Wurwilf 18 years ago
In "Wall of Boobies! (SFW)"
And those do look like boobs, rocket88...? Most women aren't actually gigando-inflato-mondo-huge like they're "supposed" to be. They're mostly flat, and they do lie along the ribcage instead of floating globulously in midair. You're quite the lucky man if you think they all look like porn stars. :p (Mannequins, people, is it that hard? All it takes is a mannequin. I know this is some sort of artistic thing, but really.)
posted by Wurwilf 18 years ago
true that. I don't usually buy people clothes to begin with, not even relatives and such. It's too "this is how I want you to look / this is who I want you to be." Bleh. The SO never got me anything, but I'd take books long before froufrou that's meant to benefit him in the first place. /sidetrack
posted by Wurwilf 18 years ago
ah, sorry. The "I heart the Dutch" and the title led me to assume. Which is bad. Understood.
posted by Wurwilf 18 years ago
Holy crap, I can think of few situations fraught with more risk than buying lingerie when you don't remember her size. Just shoot yourself in the head, it's less painful in the long run. I don't mean to be stereotypical, but... if a SO was wrong in either direction I'd be crushed. "Here's what I wish you were" vs. "You're a disgusting cow, honey, here's a tent". Or upstairs, "that's all you are, right?" vs. "this looked like it'd fit the hot salesgirl, omg she was stacked." Yay! So glad to be celibate. That said, the wall's... a little scary. Is that really hot, to you? S'kinda disembodied and weird sounding to me. Amusing, but not hot.
posted by Wurwilf 18 years ago
In "The Secret of the Hidden Hummers."
Augh, so much Law of GVW going on. This is why I hate being a pedestrian; I know y'all have no qualms about running me over, because LOL you're (slightly) bigger than me so I totally deserved it LOL better get out of your way LOL. /sidewalkrage Fun article. It's the Isle of Misfit Toys!
posted by Wurwilf 18 years ago
In ""Body sushi" is "performance art.""
Uh, not much of a fantasy if you start wondering by whom. Unless you have a busboy/dishwasher fetish.
posted by Wurwilf 18 years ago
In "Your cock here."
It is still the definition, but it's hard to stay stick thin and keep the relevant curvy bits without surgical help, because you can't control where you deposit fat. How much you have, yes; where it sits, no. That's genetic as far as I know. So when you burn it, it comes from wherever it "wants to," which may include areas you don't want to lose. Guys demand tiny limbs and waists, huge chests and perfect asses and then whine that they hate surgery, too. I guess nobody told them that women don't have magical abilities to direct where their bodies store this stuff, or they don't care. Sooooo we get little tiny stick-girls instead, because they can't help it. Some are genetically blessed to only have that 0.00001% of body fat sit ONLY where it's needed and nowhere else, and they have it good. Everyone else makes do. (And I think the stick thing is aesthetically boring - they look like prepubescent boys to me, blah, I don't want to look like that! - but I understand that it's that or surgery for many.)
posted by Wurwilf 18 years ago
Hey, I never said that the media made you that way; I said you just were that way. That said, if you start saying "we evolved to chase 16-year-old girls with huge breasts because blah blah offspring, therefore I have to cheat on you with as many hot chicks as I can, see, it's all evolutionarily correct and you're WRONG AND BLOCKING THE TRUE FLOW OF NATURE by being upset about it" while in a supposedly caring relationship [true story], I'll still think you're a twerp. Sorry. As civilized creatures we mitigate our basic urges with other needs and goals, like emotional connection and the many kinds of compatibility beyond "is it hot and will it bear my young." Or at least that's the idea.
posted by Wurwilf 18 years ago
You're one in a million, literally. The rest of us just have to cope with being alone. ;)
posted by Wurwilf 18 years ago
In "Curious, George: Keeping up with the Joneses"
oh, and at a shelf and a half of the stuff, the aforementioned was probably worth eh, two hundred bucks, I guess? Not at resale, so don't bother breaking into my apartment; I mean originally.
posted by Wurwilf 18 years ago
I don't care about my neighbors, who are all older and richer than me; as for my peers, not really, no. I'm backward, and they probably know that already. (Though, y'know, among my peers keeping up usually entails buying gaming consoles instead of cars.) Actually, knowing that I can never be cool, I've gotten kind of touchy about it. I feel kind of sick inside when I buy/rent books/movies/music because someone with similar taste to mine liked them and they sound like something I'd also like. I feel like I'm poaching on someone else's territory. I have this concept that people should discover new diversions out of thin air, but I don't understand how this process works, so I'm left feeling like a worthless follower. Ssssso, yeah, in that sense I keep up with the Joneses - I don't do it in order to impress other people, just to find things I like. And I hate it. My most egregious example is my comic collection (stfu, I have one) - I know at least one other person who liked each title before I did. Not one was bought out of thin air; the one time I did that, I didn't care for it much. Though I've also bought things by word of mouth and not liked them very much, so it does cut both ways. Still. Baaa. Baaaaaaaaaaa.
posted by Wurwilf 18 years ago
In "Wallace and Gromit are not safe for your kids."
These aren't Catholics; these are probably hard-line Protestants. I remember this site; it's appallingly adorable and hilarious in its batshit insanity. Ultimately it represents a Dark Side version of something I believe very strongly in - parents taking responsibility for what their children view, instead of relying on legislation to parent for them - and for that it is sickening, but as a simple read for entertainment, it's hysterical in both senses of the word. I'm a bit divided. Still. The Three-Letter Word might also be "God," taking the Lord's name in vain. No clue about the Worst Word Ever.
posted by Wurwilf 18 years ago
In "Your cock here."
Didn't tell him to fuck off and die because I knew I couldn't get any better. And it was true, anyway. What am I supposed to say, "no, you're wrong, I am a hot-as-hell Amazon that every woman-coveting person across the earth lusts after, let me get my leotard"? The thing about the measurement stereotype is that it's not true. Women generally don't care, although a few do, and most of those are probably shallow jerks. Men? Well, y'know. I don't blame them and all, but they do care, and it is very important, even to the brightest and most emotionally centered of them. We eventually split because our goals for LTRs were too different - he wanted to be taken care of his whole life by some magical, smokingly hot, perfectly nonemotional and always horny girlfriend who would instantly make all his problems go away, and I didn't want to be that person, let alone struggle to live up to such a ridiculous standard. I'd rather be a cat lady. Which I am. Except for the cat part. He went off, developed schizophrenia and now lives with his parents. THE END.
posted by Wurwilf 18 years ago
but I also cannot fathom why You don't know any small-breasted women then (and millions envy you). I was harangued to no end because I didn't have the perfect "spherical" (his word) comic-book-heroine DDs that were on ex's List of What I Want in a Girlfriend. I was a D at the time (fucking weight loss, taking away the only good thing I ever had! *wail*), but it wasn't good enough. Nothing I did could ever make up for it. That hurts, and being told you're not sexy - and, in our culture, therefore not valued - hurts, and if a person in that situation doesn't or can't say "fuck that, I am what I am," then... they sometimes do desperate things. That's one reason why. amen to the free PC cycles bit. Really. And damn, the money too.
posted by Wurwilf 18 years ago
In "Blizzard's WoW "
They might make it covert in order to keep it from drawing cheaters' attention, not honest players'. To a cheater this would be a big "Hi, here's what you need to crack and here's how it works!" sign. Clearly this didn't work, but I'm trying to think of *a* reason.
posted by Wurwilf 18 years ago
In "Your cock here."
Well said, musingmelpomene. I got those stupid lines from my ex, "oh all girls care about blah blah blah," when really, I didn't. It was just his rampaging insecurity, made out to be my fault. And no amount of avowals on my part would convince him that it was a bad stereotype and not universal truth. Fine, if you're going to be insecure, be that way. It's a little annoying, but not a big deal. But don't pin your paranoia on me and act like it's "how things really are." Because you made it up; it's all your gig. Making it out to be someone else's fault, and not about your own insecurity at all, sends a minor character flaw into the Really Fucking Annoying stratosphere. /rant
posted by Wurwilf 18 years ago
(limited to the most recent 20 comments)