May 06, 2005

Dozen penguins at SF zoo die after chlamydia outbreak. Sigh. My efforts as a sexuality educator have been sadly mispaced. I should have realized after these guys came out, that the penguin community was sexually active and in need of outreach.
  • Clinton! That fuckhead.
  • damn penguin sluts
  • Tux is a madd playa!
  • OK, who's been boning the penguins?
  • Shit. Now I gotta get tested.
  • The bacteria, which was most likely transmitted to the birds by an infected seagull, is spread through airborne saliva or other bodily fluids Dirty bloody seagulls, gobbing on the poor penguins, or worse! Why isn't the abstinence program working?
  • I should have realized... that the penguin community was sexually active Why did you think KOOL cigrettes had a penguin mascot? *rimshot* It's the Family Values people who are keeping Tennessee Tuxedo and Chilly Willy reruns off TV. *rimshot* And after a few hours playing "Yetigames", you'll realize they're also into S&M. *rimshot* I was going to make a comment on Opus' torrid affair with Diane Sawyer, but I sold the story exclusively to the Enquirer. *rimshot* okay, I promise not to come back until I have something positive to contribute
  • The least I could have done was give them some of these.
  • That second link is too adorable. I think I want to raise penguins now!
  • Well, just be sure and keep those promiscuous little tuxedo-wearers supplied with prophylactics and penicillin. I guess there really is something about a sharp-dressed man.
  • "is spread through airborne saliva or other bodily fluids" Uh-oh. In people too? Even those who only molest mammals?
  • Ah, penuin jailbait!
  • From patita's link: Wow
  • ...and in related news, horse herpes.
  • not far above mankind's dull stare sweep currents of feathers the geese the herons crossing continents the cranes the swans flow on and rivers of solemn-face penguins of pelicans with bellying beaks and graceful loons seize fishes as they mingle with the throbbing seas
  • Shoot, fish tick, horses get VD