September 09, 2008

Fossil Fuels Brewing Co.: The Beer That Takes You Back . . . Millions of Years.
  • On the one had, given everything I've learned from 50's sci-fi and classic Mad Scientist movies, I can't help thinking this is a very, very bad idea. On the other hand: WANT.
  • You ask, of course, why men able to imbue life would do so ultimately for booze. No, not really. Makes perfect sense to me. Also, there's a fair chance something this gimmicky will suck balls. But I'm willing to give it a test or seventeen.
  • Old Milwaukee Laurasia.
  • A neat idea, but Wheat Beer? I'll wait until they launch their Pale Ale version.
  • This, my friends, is what the Industrial Revolution was all about. Makes me proud to be human.
  • Beer made of ancient spores? Ancient spores of DEATH is more like it.
  • Hmm....knowing how different yeasts affect the flavor of bread, this is intriguing. I hope it eventually gets distributed outside of California.
  • D'oh! And when I find some, I'm going to make beer bread with it.
  • bread... d'oh... geddit?
  • In Brewsters Millions, a new movie from quidnunc kid productions, an alcoholic Australian named Montgomery Fuckwit is left one bottle of one year-old beer by a rich and stupid grandfather. But then his great-grandfather also dies, and leaves Mr. Fuckwit one MILLION bottles of one million year-old beer, on the condition that he drink the one, one-year old bottle of beer in one minute without taking pause. BUT THEN his great-great-grandfather also dies of boredom, and leaves him TEN MILLION BOTTLES OF TEN MILLION YEAR-OLD BEER on the condition that the one MILLION bottles of one million year-old beer be drunk within one one-millionth of a year without taking a piss break. BUT THEN ONE MILLION UNCLES DIE, LEAVING MONTY ONE ONE-BILLIONTH OF A BEER THAT IS ONLY ONE ONE-MILLIONTH OF A YEAR OLD ON ONE MILLION BILLION SEPARATE AND CONFUSING CONDITIONS! "***** - A klutz-crazy clause-fest, perfect for the probate attorney in your life. I laughed all the way through!" - Legal Matters Weekly
  • Here's my $9.50! (You think they can reconstitute some antediluvian popcorn while they're fiddling about with the geriatric wheat?)
  • I see Adam Sandler cast as the alcoholic Mr. Fuckwit.
  • Better yet, Adam Sandler's Grandpa.