December 13, 2007

• Pointing and jeering, mostly. (Grimsby, Ontario) *points, jeers*
• We wore HAZMAT suits and rounded the boys up into biohazard drums. Chants aren't very effective at containing infectious diseases, but if you wanna keep living in the Middle Ages go right ahead.
• After all these years...still no cure for cooties. Not even a telethon or nuthin'.
• Whaddya mean cooties? No cooties on me!
• Well, there is some concern that the preservatives used in the cooties vaccine contain metals that make you avoid going to college, where one might get more knowledge, in favor of going to Jupiter to get more stupider. I'm going to risk it and inoculate my child, so that he can grow up to be like this.
• I would also like to add that it was one fiery redhead in my kindergarten class who would flirt with me by sticking her hand inside my overalls who led me to believe that there is nothing ever wrong with wanting to touch girls. I never believed in cooties.
• Oddly enough, my school was completely cootie-free. They must have had a man in to fumigate or something.
• Nice one, Hank.
• Did any of you actually get cooties? I've never known what the dire consequences are. If you suffered from them, did you even know you had them? I think there is an inherited resistance for our children, which lasts until the hormones kick in, at which point they just wish they could get COOTIES. But, the caution our children seem to come by naturally probably works to make sure that they don't get them too early, just in case we had parents like MCT, who did get them too early and who's live was either ruined or improved. You be the judge.
• Stupid "v" really knew it needed "f" cooties.
• "...who would flirt with me by sticking her hand inside my overalls..." Did you wear overalls all the time?
• When I was a kid, I had a breathtaking collection of OshKosh overalls. It was my mom's preferred method of dressing me back then. As for now?
• PHOTOSHOP TIME!
• Are those seersucker? For winter, you really need the heavier denim. (that's one good looking kid!)
• The cooties never go away or stop being contagious. It's just that as we get older, we realize they aren't a bad thing.
• omgfatso!
• Cootie cover.
• OMG, baby train engineer squee!
• I know routers don't have age restrictions on them, but you might want to keep on something simple lie sanding blocks for now, develop that upper-body strength first.
• Anyone else use the following kind of cootie shot? You'd cross your forefingers and middle fingers perpendicularly, and another kid would provide the shot by poking his forefinger through the opening at the skin of the kid suspected of being infected. Worked every time, thank Horus.
• Na-na, I'm giving you TEH COOTIES!! Use your cootie catcher! has the added bonus of telling your future Which is worse? This kind of cootie, or THIS KIND! That blogger has LOTS of cooties. You know, this isn't a game. *folds arms, taps foot, scowls* Quick, make a cootie catcher before Hank gets here. Hank ha-as coooo-ties! Hank ha-as coooo-ties! Hank ha-as coooo-ties! Hank ha-as coooo-ties! Hank ha-as coooo-ties! Hank ha-as coooo-ties! Hank ha-as coooo-ties! Hank ha-as coooo-ties! Hank ha-as coooo-ties! Hank ha-as coooo-ties! Hank ha-as coooo-ties! Hank ha-as coooo-ties! Hank ha-as coooo-ties! Hank ha-as coooo-ties!
• OK, I never thought overalls could be so cute, UNTIL NOW! That picture is awesome on so many levels. But, yeah, I'd get some safety goggles on that small one before he starts on the lathe.
• Are those seersucker? For winter, you really need the heavier denim. Them's carpenter overalls. Heavy duty cotton, basically denim consistency. Reinforced knees, two extra hammer loops, special pockets for those nifty flat carpenter's pencils, and a removable nail apron. Also, they make chicks totally want me.
• I can't watch the PSA right now, because my (currently cootie-free) little one's asleep in the room right now, but we did the "Circle, circle, dot, dot/Now you've had your cootie shot" method. (Draw two circles and two dots, then a hard poke, on the area affected.) We also did what HW mentioned, in some cases. I guess it depended on the strain of cooties?
• You are a braver man than me, mct.
• I fear neither internet scorn nor photoshopping skills. Why? I am married. This means two things: (1) I am already scorned and mocked on a regular basis, so I am used to it and deal with the pain by telling myself it is an expression of love. (2) I will never have sex with any other women, ever, so who gives a fuck anyway.
• we did the cootie shot in NJ in the 70s MCT, that is one cootiecutiepie of a baby there!!
• Your case is persuasive sir, but I must remind you there are stripes involved here! I beseech you, in the bowels of Christ, think it possible you may be mistaken, as yer man said.
• "Them's carpenter overalls. Heavy duty cotton, basically denim consistency. Reinforced knees, two extra hammer loops, special pockets for those nifty flat carpenter's pencils, and a removable nail apron. I dunno, man, but my grandfather, who started out in the oil fields in 1910, wore the real carpenter overalls with hammers in the loops and those blunt, rectangular pencils where they belonged. I think he sharpened the latter with a razor blade since I saw no tooth marks. Here's a picture of him. He's the second from the left in the back row, the one every one's leaning away from. I think they were afraid of him. He was dressed up for the occasion and didn't have his carpenter pants on, so you just have to trust me.
• I dunno, man, but my grandfather, who started out in the oil fields in 1910, wore the real carpenter overalls with hammers in the loops and those blunt, rectangular pencils where they belonged. You insult me doubly, madam. For one, you imply that my loops have seen no hammers and that my pencil pockets are a mere affectation. For another, you imply that my overalls are a mere trendy latter-day product. Would it impress you sufficiently to know that the very style -- nay, the very brand of overalls I sport in that photo are the same that my own grandfather wore, a man who, though not the murderous alcoholic yours apparently was, was indeed a first-rate carpenter who started his family on a poor, hard-worked dirt farm and retired a moderately wealthy small-town man who subsidized his own retirement by restoring and selling antiques a mortal man would have discarded callously, evidence that he had both the strong back of a Missouri dirt farmer and the delicate, fine-tuned hands of an artist? WHAT WOULD YOU SAY THEN, HMM?
• IF I DO NOT GET THE RESPECT I DESERVE THEN I WILL BE FORCED TO POST PICS OF HAWAIIAN SHIRT DAY AS WELL
• *surreptitiously deletes own post*
• NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
• Hawaiian shirts? Man, I *only* wear them. Apart from my 'I like cheese' and 'Monkeyfilter' tees, which I wear to AA meetings. And my fez.
• I sometimes wear pants.
• Damn, path, that's one badass-lookin' group of fellers. And Grampa Path (Grampath?) looks like the toughest of 'em all. I bet he could take them all down in a champagne fight.
• 
• /collapse
• oh yes
• Tears. TEARS!!!
• Heh.
• Well done, old man.
• *applauds*
• Fantastic.
• That giant baby in overalls will take over the world!!!
• you must save that pic to show yr son when he's older!
• Awesome!
• Freaky Friday II: Bad Dad
• And in one photo, the summation of Rick Moranis' post-SCTV career.
• Now for the Hawaiian shirt!!
• I thank you!
• Brilliant, Hank!
• I got an idea for another one ;)
• I wait with bated breath. The more the lulz, the greater my respect for you. No pressure, or anything.
• And if you can't inoculate against the cooties, just blind them.
• Jesus Christ, woman. I look like a goddamn beet.
• How come we never get a picture of Dad & lad in matching Carters blanket sleepers? Just joshin' - the Hawaiian picture is so sweet I just had to take ten extra units of insulin.
• I always thought MCT was a lady. Not a hot(ish) dude. Hank Mabuse the academy applauds you.
• WELL DONE!! It's the orange, MCT, makes you look flushed. Or maybe it was the gin, what do I know. Bring the boy his bottle! *begins chant* CAR-TERS! CAR-TERS! CAR-TERS! CAR-TERS! CAR-TERS! CAR-TERS! CAR-TERS!