October 20, 2006

Knicker Vicar to the Rescue Concerned clergyman bravely confronts New Zealand's chronic underwear shortage.

I include this newsworthy item as a serious alternative to the recent rash of urinal related items which I decry as being sophomoric and unworthy of the type sober discussion which is the hallmark of this site. Also it deals with important developments from New Zeland which sadly has not claimed its fair share of the world stage despite Tracicle's strenous efforts to raise its international profile.

  • Penis.
  • OK I'll play along. Testicles!
  • Reverend Husband. Say no more.
  • Oh, and bollocks!
  • Knickers? *snickers*
  • He said he came up with the idea after the problem was brought to his attention by women in his congregation. "Forgive me father, I have been going commando for three months. In fact, I'm not wearing anything right now..." "Right! Off to the big city! We're going to get you some underwear, good solid wide-seat granny-panties! Bless you, child, for coming forward, and having the courage to shield yourself from the holier parts of God's Creation!"
  • This would never happen in Utah, as Mormons take their panties very seriously.
  • 8th Comment: Profit!!
  • Finally, an FPP about UNDERPANTS! Something for MEEEE! I wish we'd had a knicker vicar when I was a teen. I, too, lived in a small town without a clothing store, and no transportation into the city. I vividly remember having to mend my remaining knickers until there was no more mend to them.
  • Capt. Yes, like most people, whenever I start running low on unmentionables, the local Pastor or religious dignitary is inevitably the first person think of telling and my greatest hope for getting the problem solved. BTW, does New Zealand have excessively flouridated water or lead plumbing or something?
  • I think it has something to do with being nuke-free. Mind needs a steady dose of radiation to stimulate growth.
  • So this is like the opposite to the buses full of old ladies headed for the casinos for their weekly blowing-of-the-inheritance. I have never been to Inglewood (in fact, barely been to the North Island), but I didn't think it was so small as to have a single clothes shop, let alone one that wouldn't stock undies.
  • Inglewood sounds a little dirty!
  • But potentially fun!
  • Oh, my name is John Wellington Wells I'm a dealer in panties and tights We've briefs and we've thongs Underwear for the throngs In black that bewitches, or whites ...
  • And if anyone underpants lacks, I've got 'em in two- and three-packs, If you'll call in on me, you can have BVD's, At 70 St. Mary Axe!
  • I am flattered that Australia named their underwear after me. I didn't realize I had that big of an effect on you guys (and girls! hi girls!).
  • Snickers knickers (surprisingly SFW).
  • I see an opening in the market!
  • My wife tells me, "It's too embarrassing to go out and have to spend a penny; the last of my knickers is in shreds and as for the rest, well, I haven't any! My knickers have so many holes they might do for a sieve; and furthermore, such draughtiness is a most unhealthy way to live! There's no fun going into town if I must go bare as a Hottentot!" I said, "Darling, don't yell, don't weep! Clam down! And don't get your knickers in a knot!" No clam isn't a typo. It was path's invention.
  • I am flattered that Australia named their underwear after me. I didn't realize I had that big of an effect on you guys (and girls! hi girls!). posted by Mr. Knickerbocker at 10:06PM UTC on October 20, 2006 AHEM! It's NZ, not Australia. I realise that a Canadian like yourself might have a bit of trouble telling the difference, but they are some couple of thousand miles apart. Also, the people in New Zealand have given up all of their English vowels to the Maori language.
  • They call underpants "Misters" in the Antipodes?
  • OK, gomi. I also see a business opportunity. Why let all that business go to New Plymouth? I see a cute little shop called "Lara's Secret" right on Main Street, Inglewood.