October 18, 2004

Redneck Theology. Includes some excelent pictures of modern rednecks.
  • Well, horses *are* better than people. And having animals in your house *is* cool. I just wonder how they get the ponies in over the edge of the bath.
  • It may be because I'm from the north, but I'm a redneck myself. And guess what: OUR T-SHIRTS FIT!@#
  • Richer, I believe that a redneck with a shirt that fits is actually either a hick or a hoosier. You'll find a mix of all 3 varieties in the border states but rednecks are generally confined to areas south of the Mason-Dixon line.
  • Was this posted on MeFi? I saw this site two days ago but I have no idea why I ended up there.
  • omg. oracle consulting has spread to the 'necks.
  • [via The Daily WTF, which was on MeFi]
  • I always thought redneck was for conservative farmers, who wear hats, but get their necks burned from being out in the sun all day. I always pictured a neat, respectable, but very conservative Albertan cattle farmer. People with trucks on blocks - well, we're just white trash.
  • Am still stupified by the cleanliness freaks who carry their horses into the shower. D'oh! I've been doing it all wrong! Anyhow, up with Allapoosas!
  • I would simply set up a shower head outside. And I can do that, because I know how. And then I would drink a beer. In fact.. hell, I'll drink a beer right now.
  • I had rather drink meself blind than carry a horse. Anywhere. Especially a Percheron or a Shire.
  • Why would anyone carry a horse? "He's not well, again" *eeyooore!*
  • Why would anyone carry a horse? Answer # 1: To put it into the bathtub. Answer # 2: Because it couldn't walk any further just then. The Poor Dear. Answer # 3: And anyway, the damn fool asked to be carried. Answer # 4: Well see, there woz this shortage of trucks/lorries (the kind without feathers), sir. Answer # 216: Does this mean I don't win the contest, sir?
  • Sometimes you carry the horse, sometimes the horse carries you. Sometimes you bathe the horse, sometimes the horse bathes you. Sometimes you got r00t, sometimes r00t got you!
  • Answer # 5: I ne'er could carry a tune sah, so the lute's right out. All I's got is me 'orses.
  • On the occaison of my first being invited to join the company of my father's equestrian associates after dinner (I hasten to say I was only 11), my fatal (or near-fatal) facility in parody prompted me to utter, "Me arse, me arse, me kingdom for an arse!" by way of an ice-breaker. My father, once he collected himself, seized me by one ear and led me forth from the sputtering company. Even after these many years, I really prefer not to dwell on subsequent events.
  • /snake-eyed look @ beeswacky Time for your CAT scan.
  • O snake-eyed one, ye owe me a chookie story. Where is it?
  • This guy seems to be mocking rural Americans. When I look at him with his shirt hiked up insincerely, I want to punch him in his belly. I don't believe you can attain "redneck nirvana" from casual studying. I believe you have to go through "the priesthood" from an early age -- in which you grow up poor, work your ass off, get stepped on and mammocked, and retain a sense of nostalgia about how good the bad times were.
  • I have to get a picture of my Chook, bees. I'll do it, I swear. Then I'll make a page and link it somehow somewhere. I've only got a usb camera, so I have to perch the chook on the 'puter table.. I sort of .. want to wait until I can make sure it won't shit everywhere.
  • this post is symptomatic of all these recent redneck jokes. wtf is up with this? every four years, generally around election time, we bring out the increasingly mythic representation of white workin class southerners to mock and feel at once american and better than american. this site's lamer than the blue collar comedy troupe on comedy central
  • omg ew... in my head there's this distinction between redneck and southerner...I love southerners, but seriously dislike rednecks. They're just ugly. and scary. like little savages, but with land and guns. ew
  • If they are farmers, then they are "Agro-Americans", rather than rednecks.
  • ROCK103.COM knows the true definition of a redneck! http://www.burgerfamily.net/downloads/you_might_be_a_redneck.jpg Note how the modern redneck has gone high-tech: wireless phone, bottle, porcelain deck chair, and solid red rectangular TP, which can be disposed of under the trailer in furtherance of water conservation. He's a model citizen, consulting with his stockbroker about buying another 200 shares of Enron.
  • Classic Jeff Foxworthy Redneck-ology (And when exactly did Foxworthy and his friends change from "Red Neck" to "Blue Collar"?)
  • More sophisticated fun in Oklahoma.